How to spot a Sundowns fan?
He wears an old disprin yellow jersey at non soccer events
You see him at doctors’ strikes, taxi strikes, security strikes, truck drivers strike etc…just what the heck is his occupation?
He always talks of Motsepe’s billions while begging money to buy a cigarette
He always compares his clubs’ successes to that of Chiefs
How to spot a Celtics fan?
Simple: Any man that celebrates a lose while wearing ladies bra and a shower cap
How to spot a SuperSport fan?
You get him in taverns drinking milk in ice cubes…ke letsatsantsa
He does not support bafana bafana, he is unique
How do you spot a Chiefs fan?
He/she talks less in soccer topics, his team’s wining record speaks for him
How to spot a Pirates fan?
He/she always talk of his team’s come back every end of season
He/she is violent and the main reason why Chiefs fans talk less
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Once a Pirate always a Pirate by OJ Mabizela
I was once a good person. Everyone used to sing praises of the good things I used to do. Then I joined Pirates. My whole life changed. I now make headlines for doing bad things. I need help, I consulted psychologists, priests, traditional healers, magicians etc...and all of them are unable to assist me. All they say is one thing: I have put an irreversible curse to my life by joining Orlando Pirates. Gift Leremi left Pirates and passed away shortly afterwards. Ronald Mkandawire and Bibi Mutombo also passed away after leaving the team. Mandla 'Metroblitz' Sithole appeared in court for stabbing someone to death. Lucky Lekhwathi also appeared in court for robbery and injuring someone with a knife. Jimmy Tau is beginning to hear strange things like whistles that were never blown. What have I done to myself to behave like Jabu and Steve? I guess they are right ONCE A PIRATE ALWAYS A PIRATE
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Chuck Norris’ advice to PSL
SuperSport’s 2-1 defeat to Golden Arrows, and Orlando Pirates 1-1 draw with Ajax on Wednesday means the league championship is open to both Pirates and SuperSport and will be decided on the last day of the season this coming Saturday. SuperSport takes on Santos in Cape Town, Pirates takes on Amazulu in Johannesburg.
The PSL have been handed a massive headache as they try to work out whether to send the Absa Premiership trophy down to Cape Town or keep it in Gauteng. Finding no solution to the problem, PSL turned to Chuck Norris for Answers:
Chuck Norris' advice to PSL: I am known for believing and doing the impossible, like regularly using Nandos' hot sauce as eye drops to heal my itching eye, killing two stones with one bird and so forth. But believing Pirates will win the league is just way beyond my thoughts. So my advice to PSL is: simply take the trophy to Cape Town.
The PSL have been handed a massive headache as they try to work out whether to send the Absa Premiership trophy down to Cape Town or keep it in Gauteng. Finding no solution to the problem, PSL turned to Chuck Norris for Answers:
Chuck Norris' advice to PSL: I am known for believing and doing the impossible, like regularly using Nandos' hot sauce as eye drops to heal my itching eye, killing two stones with one bird and so forth. But believing Pirates will win the league is just way beyond my thoughts. So my advice to PSL is: simply take the trophy to Cape Town.
Monday, April 20, 2009
Baka-JuJu a fan of the Happy People Team
On his way to his shack at the back of his parents’ house, wearing an old black shirt printed ‘Chibuku’ in white, he greets his neighbors with a happy smile as usual ‘Hola majimbos’ to which they all reply ‘Hola Baka Juju’.
A 7 year old boy runs to him and asks “why are you always this happy?” He replies with a smile "heitha bafana-bafana, you see my-laitie, I am a fan of a big team called the Happy People, and happiness is in our blood".
The boy asks "so, your team is always winning?”
"Yes, Mchana, always" he replies. The boy asks "what have your team won?" He replies "hehe Bafanas, In 1972 we won the Sales House Cup, followed by Life Challenge Cup in 1973, then followed by Mainstay in 1980, Chibuku Challenge in 19…"
before he could finish the sentence the boy stops him: "wait I am only 7 years old can you at least begin from the year I was born?"
He replies "Eish you see Bafanas, In 2004, we almost won the league, in 2005, we almost won the…” before he could finish his sentence the boy stops him again: "wait, can you please tell me of what you have won and not of what you almost won?"
He gets irritated by the boy’s questions and yells "Mmao wa leChiefs o go romile gore o tlo tshwenyana le moya waka, Satane ke wana. Voetsek…!!! Tsamaya o ye go dlala le dithaka tsa gao, you piece of rubbish” he kicked the boy from the back: “Voetsek, Hamba…”
There goes the story of Baka-JuJu a fan of Happy People Team.
A 7 year old boy runs to him and asks “why are you always this happy?” He replies with a smile "heitha bafana-bafana, you see my-laitie, I am a fan of a big team called the Happy People, and happiness is in our blood".
The boy asks "so, your team is always winning?”
"Yes, Mchana, always" he replies. The boy asks "what have your team won?" He replies "hehe Bafanas, In 1972 we won the Sales House Cup, followed by Life Challenge Cup in 1973, then followed by Mainstay in 1980, Chibuku Challenge in 19…"
before he could finish the sentence the boy stops him: "wait I am only 7 years old can you at least begin from the year I was born?"
He replies "Eish you see Bafanas, In 2004, we almost won the league, in 2005, we almost won the…” before he could finish his sentence the boy stops him again: "wait, can you please tell me of what you have won and not of what you almost won?"
He gets irritated by the boy’s questions and yells "Mmao wa leChiefs o go romile gore o tlo tshwenyana le moya waka, Satane ke wana. Voetsek…!!! Tsamaya o ye go dlala le dithaka tsa gao, you piece of rubbish” he kicked the boy from the back: “Voetsek, Hamba…”
There goes the story of Baka-JuJu a fan of Happy People Team.
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